The love of a mother.

Every 7 years, my mom shares her special day with another, more recognized, special day - Mother's Day. Growing up I always thought this was so fitting. She is everything a mother should be - kind, compassionate, patient, and loving. She was meant to be a mother to her three babies, and especially to her little Colton, who needs her love more than anyone else. Somehow she finds a way to share herself. I guess that's what being a mother is all about. 

Even though I was never able to spend these days with her, I always tried to give back some of the love she showed me throughout the year. Someday I'll be able to see her, hug her, and spoil her rotten on her special days. But for now, dedicating a special post just to her will have to do.

So Happy Mother's/Birth Day Mom! I love you with my whole heart.

You are my sunshine.

Christmas time.

For our first married Christmas together, we visited the magical land of Washington with it's miles of blue waters and endless green trees. In this mystical state resides my family - my mom, her husband, and my two little brothers. We were lacking in the Christmas spirit until we landed in the 20 degree chill, and suddenly we knew what it was like to feel like Christmas.

   

From walks in the rain to late night talks; from real Christmas trees to real white snow; from trips to Multnomah Falls to shopping in downtown Portland and watching Les Miserable in the best theater in the US; this had to be my absolute favorite Christmas of all time. We stayed through New Years and were able to bond so much with my beautiful family. And even though the snow didn't stick to the ground, I still consider this the perfect white Christmas.

Can you hear the people sing?

I'm not gonna lie, I'm one of those stereotypical musical theater nerds who grew up singing all the soprano solos for Les Miserables and dreamed of one day being able to sit in the front row while listening to real live singers belt those beautiful lyrics and tug my heart strings with those unbelievable chords. Not to mention that Jean Valjean is the musical man of my dreams, and Javert is the musical man of my nightmares. Not enough imagery for ya? Well here are some pictures of my amazing night seeing Les Mis with my wonderful family...before my camera died.

That last one is supposed to show the rest of our family...and that was the best I could do before my camera took it's last breath.

But on a serious note, Les Mis was the bomb dot com. I wanted to go every single night after that to watch it again. I'd probably rank it as my 6th best experience of my life, and I cried at least 53 times, but who's counting?

Highlight of my night: Kendall expressing confusion until I related the characters to Hugh Jackman and Russell Crowe. Of course as soon as I related it to a movie a received a huge "OH!" and he was immediately interested. Instead of calling them their stage names, he continued to call them Hugh and Russell through the whole musical. I love my movie nerd of a husband.

Back on my old stomping ground..

And by stomping ground, of course I mean Big Surf Waterpark, where I worked like a billion years ago.

And I did not get one good picture the whole time! Kendall looking away, Selah's glasses all askew...I'm so disappointed in myself.

Moving on. About a week ago, the Clark family decided to have a family day at Big Surf! Since me and Kendall are the only ones without kids, we adopted Selah for the day and let her tag along with all the little nieces and nephews. It was so fun to watch those little fish while I worked on my tan in the pool.

I think it's safe to say, I'm going to be sad when you're gone, Summer.

An angel.

Today started off a little strange. 

I was more tired than usual and had to absolutely drag myself out of bed. I forgot to eat breakfast and went through the whole morning with a grumbly stomach while dealing with an overly emotional 3-year-old girl.

Then it happened.

Out of nowhere, the world kind of stopped. My sister, my life-long best friend, and a huge part of my heart woke up to her 3-week-old son cold in her arms. The rest of my day was a blur of feelings, emotions, and interactions until I heard her voice on the phone telling me she loved me and wanted to see me. Her voice shaking and breaking brought me back to reality. This wasn't just a baby somewhere far away. This was my nephew. My sister's son. My family's pain. This wasn't something that I could feel discomfort about and then it was gone. This was something that was going to last forever.

Sometimes life isn't fair. Sometimes inconceivable things happen to people who don't deserve it, people who already have a difficult life as it is. Sometimes hardship falls on those who can't handle it. Sometimes hardship falls into the hands of those who can handle it, because others in the world can't. My sister is one of those people who can handle the burdens of the world; she is the strongest person I know.

I wish I could be there for her more than anything; to comfort her, to tell her what I know and that she'll be with Isaac again someday. That a precious baby left her side, but an angel watches over her from above now. As sad as it is to see a beautiful soul leave this earth and the sadness it brings to my family, I know that Heavenly Father needed him home more than we did.

I can't wait to meet you someday, baby Isaac, my beautiful nephew. We miss you too much already.

Cabin fever.

This past weekend, we got some much needed R&R.

What does R&R mean in our case? Probably not what we thought it might, but we'll get to that later. For now, I'm going to tell you our weekend novel the same way I like to eat my Oreos, cookie first, and I'll save that sweet filling for later.

We took Friday afternoon off work to drive up to Kendall's family cabin in Strawberry, Arizona for a short weekend vay-cay. The weather was magical, and I could smell those pines from miles away. My dad even let us borrow his Jeep for our romping pleasures. When we arrived, we threw our stuff inside and headed down the road to Strawberry Lodge for dinner and the best pie of our lives. Seriously. If you've never had Buttermilk pie, you need to rethink what your life is coming to.

Let's not mention our Friday night spider hunting fiasco and skip forward to Saturday night. We get a text from our sister-in-law asking how long we were planning on staying and that her little family might want to come up. Once they listened to our coaxing to get their tushes up there, we spent the rest of our weekend watching movies, shooting into the wind, and eating more pie.

How cute is our family? How fun does this vacation look? Does that gun make my butt look big?

Kendall's going to have to put up with my whines and moans about going back soon. Very soon.

{Wedding Week} Day One

I don't know how it was for anyone else that has been engaged or is engaged, but it just hit me this weekend that I'm really really getting married. Four days, people. As I'm sitting there getting my hair and make-up done for my bridal shoot, something inside me grabs my stomach and pulls hard. This may have been a combination of the knowledge that Kendall was about to see me exactly how I'm going to be when he says "I do," and that I forgot to eat that day -- but what it felt like to me was that the wedding monster had crawled inside me and yelled "it's here! Are you ready?" 

Freak-out week begins now.

Anyways, today I'm going to share with you a few photos from my bridal shower! As much as I hate being the center of attention and being around a large group of people, I had so much fun at my bridal shower. I'm so thankful for everyone who came to support and love me. The gifts were pretty great, too.

Special thanks to Bree, Ashtyn, Katie and Kendal for putting everything together for the shower. You guys are the best and sure do know how to make a girl feel special.